Midnight Shorts Program

20 03 2010

If you ever get a chance to see a late night film shorts program… GO!  The amount of creativity that these directors can pack into 10-20 minutes is crazy.  Last night, I went to the Midnight Shorts Program #1 at the CIFF ’10.  Here are some highlights from the crazy evening.

The Action Hero's Guide to Saving Lives

"Go fish shit head"

What brought me there was one particular short film called The Action Hero’s Guide to Saving Lives.  If the badass photo of Patrick Warburton (Puddy from Seinfeld) in full action hero pose with a 2 foot flame off the tip of his gun doesn’t make you want to see this film… then you should probably slap yourself because you have no sense of Awesome. Aside from brilliant humor mixed in with the strong B-film action vibes exuded by Warburton (aka. Officer Patrick Mulligan), director Justin Lutzky keeps the audience engaged in the film by departing from the everyday “guide to” narration style.  He utilized the main character’s actions and signature one-liner’s to create a hilarious do’s and don’ts of the action world.

BLOODY CRUMBLE is the story of a group of thugs who don’t seem to know who they’re dealing with.” (CIFF website)  That description pretty much sums up the first film we watched.  There’s little else I can add except, who knew French criminals were so funny… and the twist at the end was frickin’ hilarious.

I don’t think the Not Even Death trailer does the film justice… but the fact that the website is called www.stopjackie.com is quite fitting.  The whole time I wasn’t sure if I was supposed to be scared, laughing or grossed out.  If you ever see a shorts program with this film… WATCH IT!

In the spirit of film shorts… these are my opinions of the rest of the films:

  • Aphrodite’s Farm – cool cinematography… milk will never taste the same again
  • A Good Life – Sad and painful… but it could be worse
  • The Intruder – Classic ghost thriller… creeped the shit out of me
  • Porcelain & Diamonds – Great if you get a kick out of poop jokes… it was true bathroom humor
  • Sebastian’s Voodoo – Awesome animation and no words… because the characters were voodoo dolls
  • What Happens in Encino – Moderately funny… and thoroughly weirded me out

NPH himself

And finally, the greatest part of my short experience was the director of Dracula’s Daughters vs. Space Brains, Cleveland born Frank Ippolito.  As I was waiting in line (I was 4th in line… because I’m awesome), I met Frank and the directors of Porcelain & Diamonds (also Cleveland natives).  Frank was obviously intoxicated, which he clearly stated that he had just come from partying at the Hard Rock Cafe bar (who could blame him, it was the world premier).  In the time before the films, he told me that he started in make-up and costume design, which he learned while working at Six Flags (currently Geagua Lake).  His talent shows in his film.  In the 4 minute run time, he packs in hot vampires, Neil Patrick Harris (Doogie Howser) and crazy floating space brains that shoot brain goo.  What made it great was the costume, make up and animation… and of course NPH ripping his head open.

Overall the night was a success and I got to witness Frank running up and down the aisles with the parking validation guy yelling  “parking validation and Space Brains posters!” as he handed out posters and drunkenly signed them… I of course got the second poster and the first signature.




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